About Neigh-moronic-bours

Been meaning to blog about this but I haven't had enough time. I came home 2 nights ago at around 11pm to find a pink slip of paper stuck to my door...

"Dear neighbour, please be considerate to your neigbours. We can smell you smoking from your room every evening. Please go downstairs to smoke. #12-54."

The Stiletto practically had to HAUL me into the flat to stop me from stomping over and hammering on my neighbour's door. I was LIVID. Who the fuck did these assholes think they were?! Telling me I couldn't smoke in my own house?!

I mean... That's tantamount to me saying... "Dear neighbour, I can smell it every time you take a fucking dump. Your shit REALLY stinks. Please be considerate to your neighbours and go downstairs to use the fucking public toilet every time nature calls. #12-58." Bloody ridiculous. Oh. And just for spite, that night, I smoked TWICE as much as I normally do. So there. Bite me, muthafucker. Call the fucking cops. I'll LOVE to be there when they laugh you out the fucking door.

Sheesh. Can't handle me smoking? Move! Or stop being such a fucking skinflint and turn on the damn air conditioning.

I swear... The people living around me are all bloody weird.

About 2 years ago, sometime around the Lunar New Year, my direct neighbour (from #12-56) came knocking and bitching about the kum kwat plant I had at my doorstep. According to him, the damn plant was an ant magnet and the damn ants were infesting his damn flat. I was fucking amazed, since (1) there were no ants to be seen when I checked around the pot and (2) the ants managed to crawl 30 FEET to HIS front door but somehow, managed to miss MINE, which was only 6 INCHES away.

So. In a nutshell. I live in a neighbourhood with fucking morons as neighbours. But very brilliant ants. Haaaaaaaaah!